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6th-Sep-2006 02:28 pm - Notice to All
I think I'm gonna change things up a bit here --> http://kokitty.livejournal.com/ <-- with a new LJ handle. I'm sick of 'navale' and have been for a while. I've also had that journal for a while, on the sidelines until I made up my mind. Well I've made it up. If you're a friend, add 'kokitty' to your friends list in LJ. I've got most you guys added already I think. I shall soon abandon this journal and do... well who knows what with it. Either it'll go private or I'll see if I can delete it. Kokitty is just much cuter sounding. w00t
2nd-Sep-2006 11:05 pm - Hungover. But it was worth it.
Our party last night was awesome. Everyone had a good time, especially me. :P I have the hangover to prove it... not a bad one at least. Just constant nausea. It's my own fault for not eating enough before I started drinking - I know better. AH well. We got some awesome pictures from the party too! I'm probably gonna upload them in the next few days. Em and I tried to go to Walgreens to print out a few tonight, but they had just turned off the machine we needed since we went late. Oh well~ we're gonna go again either tomorrow or on our days off.

AHH SO MUCH FUN >< Just hung out with everyone, played some drunken guitar hero, chatted and chilled and it was all so great. Thank you, friends, for coming (those of you who did). We plan to have another party for Halloween, so put us in your calendar now :P And yes, Stefan, I would fucking love to go see Flogging Molly. This time I won't bail on you. As long as tickets are affordable I am so there :D WHOO!
28th-Aug-2006 05:46 pm - Day Off~
So I finally built the hutch that goes with my desk. And all I can say is "YAY" :) I am happy with it, and I even have adorned it with my miniature statues (found them while cleaning) of Trevi Fountain and the Colosseum that I bought in Rome a long time ago. Ahhhh Roma, ti amo. I am happy for this, because honestly... it's the only thing I've done today besides punish my cat and brush up on my Guitar Hero skills. >< Em and I have vowed to have our apartment completely clean and COMPLETELY unpacked in all senses by this Friday for our housewarming shindig. I do believe I have invited most the people who read this... Stefan, Gregg, Melissa, Taylor, Chris. You must all come. RSVP to me if you haven't already. Or I shall call and stalk you all. :) And just in case we didn't let you know, if you plan to drink (and yes there will be some liquor) please come equipped with cash donation. And dressed for a hawaiian beach party, since that's our theme. OR ELSE. o_O

Well now that my computer desk is mostly set up... off I go to tackle more of my room and the junk left in there. Blah. But I can't wait till Em gets home from work and sees my hutch. She shall be proud of me, and there will be much rejoicing *cue 'Yaaaay'*... and then much cleaning left to do. /sigh/
24th-Aug-2006 12:13 am - Hell Yes
wah wah!!!

Oh that's right. I look like a bunch of hot women. HELL YEAH.
wah wah!!!
Life has its twists and turns sometimes, I have to say... I attended Crystal's going away to Japan party yesterday. I'm gonna miss her! But I have absolutely vowed to go visit her in Japan, preferably next April during the Cherry Blossom Festival. So I'm gonna start saving :) Expensive plane tickets. Eek~ Her party, which started at two, ended up with the last few good friends left there going out to dinner. These friends, myself included, also included Matt (the guy I dated a bit back in Jan/Feb between dating Bud), who I hadn't seen since ooooh February. There definately ended up being some hard-core flirting, especially from his end, and I have to admit it was a really nice incident. He also bought me a margarita, so I can't complain! After some other downers this weekend I really needed the attention, and it was welcome. Anywho, I think we're gonna start hanging out again, which could be cool. We'll see~ I also got phone numbers from some of Crystal's other friends I knew, and we vowed to hang out while she's away :) It makes me happy. I like making new friends, and Carrie and Liz (the girls #s I got) were really nice. I definately plan to call them sometime. Hurrah for more people to hang out with~
19th-Aug-2006 12:04 pmRead 'em and weap
Why is it that something like a dream, that you barely even remember, can make you so angry and upset. I'm very frustrated right now. I don't know what to do with myself. Again.
16th-Aug-2006 05:50 pm - The Beach? Anyone?
Today.. so far... has been a great day. I would like to especially thank Chris for that. He was kind enough to give me a massage down at the Salon in Cherry Creek, free of charge. For an hour and a half. And then bought me chai. Nice, cold, iced chai. After my first real professional massage. Hell Yes. So thank you! I am so happy that one of my best friends is a massage therapist! Yay! And fun to hang out with too~ we must play more Champions of Norrath when we have time...

I'm feeling in such a good mood, and so relaxed, that really what I want to do now is go to the beach. Go play in the water while it's still warm, then sit around chilling with friends, maybe make a bbq pit and eat some good food... with some good liquor. That is what I feel like doing. Preferably on specific beach on Maui. Anyone wanna go? Anyone got the $$$ to go? Cuz I think it'd be fun stuff. Haha~ And by the way, Stefan, I may be down for your little camping idea , just in case you read this. Just give me details and I'll see.

On a different note, I get to go to OCD group with a friend tonight. I'm slightly happy, because I know it'll be great for me to go with her. Slightly nervous, cuz I don't know what to expect, but really in the end I think this is a great idea. Speaking of great ideas, apartment deposits are great ideas. I just got mine back from my last place, and hooray for getting that money! It's so worth paying it in the first place. Except they scrimped me on one of my pet deposits, so I must yell at them and demand more money. Left a message, hope to hear back soon. Yay money though. I'm getting a good raise at work too, so yay again for money. I shall possibly be able to pay my rent on my own for the first time without my parents help. That deserves a 'w00t'.
12th-Aug-2006 12:22 amRead 'em and weap
I don't understand why I can't manage to lift myself back up.
10th-Aug-2006 02:12 am - To draw or not to draw!!
I shall never listen to jazz music again. The last several hours have been... torture. Thank God for SoBe Adrenaline Rush.

On another note, Chris has been trying to convince me that in my approaching spare-time (thanks to graduating) I should *cue dramatic music* write/illustrate a webcomic!!! Melissa, you may remember my ridiculous spoof 'Shojo no Adventure', a general spoof of 'Magic Knights Rayearth' amongst every other anime genre. It has since changed names to 'Radial Flux' (much cooler sounding). Most the characters are either based on people I know (at least by looks), or are taken and made fun of from other series/genres/characters. For example.. one of the villains is a Trekkie. The lead characters are three school girls turned 'magical-girl' based on myself, Sarah, and Melissa. The Cheshire Cat is a cute cat girl who appears every once in a while to riddle-me-this, and is based slightly on you Taylor! She is a product of the Page Maester (yes Maester like in FFX), who weaves tall tales to ensnare our heroines (did I mention she's a lesbian?). There is a holy Flamingo, who is the messenger of Lucifer, who makes regular appearances (and is of course a bishounen, or 'beautiful man' for those of you who don't get anime-lingo). And above all, the story takes place on a planet called 'Bishounia', which is massly populated by gorgeous anime men. :D Anywho... a webcomic could take a lot of work, especially since I haven't fine-tuned all the areas of the plot yet.

So my question is... who thinks I should do it? Who would care, or find it amusing? And how often would you suggest I update it if I do it? Weekly? Bi-weekly? Montly? Daily?
There would of course, be a guide for all those of you who aren't familiar with things such as 'bishounen', 'magical girls', and the many anime cameos that will occur. Anywho, just wanna get a feel for if it would be a worthy endeavor or not.
7th-Aug-2006 05:50 pm - Busy Bee
wah wah!!!
Ahh time to relax. The last few days have been especially busy. It's almost refreshing, but it really reminds me that I just need more time to chill. Then again, since Emily is on vacation, chilling means being alone with my cats, which is most likely a part of why I've kept so busy the last few days...

Friday I got to hit up a Jazz Club in Denver with my friends from my museum class back in May. Nicole, Kirsten, Emily S. (yes another Emily) and I all went and listened to a jazz set, then went and hit up the club next door (which was pretty exclusive looking with all the fancy red carpets and velvet rope). We got lucky and bypassed the huge line and were let in in front of everyone cuz we convinced Emily to go chat up the bouncer. She asked if we could get in, he asked if we were all female, she said yes, he wanted to check us out, we came over, and he let us inside in front of everyone. W00t. Talk about feeling special. Hehe. It was a cool looking place too, but I have to admit the people were extremely fake and snobbish, nowhere near as laid back as Boulder. Speaking of Boulder, after that we hit up the Boulder Theatre, then the Pearl St Pub, and then crashed at Nicole's place, which is very awesome.

Fast forward to the next night, after work, I spent several hours with Debbie and Punkin's kittens. The little black one - Cinders as I have dubbed her, whom I adore and wish I could bring home, cuddled right up in my lap and just crashed for a while. SO CUTE! Anywho, was out late chatting it up over at Debs. Next day, hit up Taylor's B-day BBQ in Boulder and had a great time. Wish I could have stayed longer, but I had to hit up another jazz performance that afternoon for my class. Silly me saw a sign for a jazz trio while I was at the Pearl St Pub on friday night taking shots with my girls, wrote the info down on the back of a coaster and pocketed it. :P Anywho, got Chris and Ryan to go with me and we just chilled for a bit.

The rest of last night was pretty laid back. Got together with Crystal, and we just hit up Macaroni Grill for dinner (Way good food) then bummed around my place watching 'Bridget Jones The Edge of Reason'. Today after class I met up with Nicole and gave her a ride home, and gave her her bra back (she had borrowed a strapless one from me on FRI and left hers in my apt). We chatted for a bit, hit up Savers and ended with disappointment, then got some burgers at the place nearby. All in all fun yet relaxing. And now I'm at home, glad to be here, and plan to stay in the rest of the night relaxing more.

I plan to make some necklaces for my cousins, one of which had a birthday last month, and the other of which is having a birthday this month. Gonna also try to clean up the last of my boxes in the living room so Emily doesn't come back home to the same mess she left behind. I don't want the stress around for either of us. The less stress the better :D So off I go, to clean and chill and maybe play video games with Chris later.
3rd-Aug-2006 01:30 am - Truth is stranger than fiction
The last two weeks have been a whirlpool of cloudiness, sadness, hope, effort, and confusion. I have, however, accumulated some new music, which is becoming more and more pleasant to listen to. For instance the song listed below that I am listening to right now. I heard it on the radio, and I actually made the effort to look up what it was they played. I like it. Recently, I have also enjoyed lots of Jewel, especially her song 'Goodbye Alice in Wonderland'.
Go down the rabbit hole?... lyricsCollapse )

I'm starting to feel better after all my drama this week. Well, perhaps 'better' isn't the right way to describe it. I have felt for the last week or two that I have had a storm of emotions surrounding me, a big black cloud, and it has just now settled into more of a slightly thick fog. It's all still in my head to some extent, but I have realized there is nothing I can do about all my emotions, and I'm trying to let it all rain out. It's happening slowly, but it seems to be clearing so far.

On a happier less emo note, I get to go to a Jazz Club in Denver this friday with my friends from my Maymester class (Emily S, Nicole, and Kirsten). I'm excited to get to spend some time with them. I really wish we had spent more time together over the last two months, and I plan to keep in touch better with them all from now on. On sunday Taylor is celebrating her birthday! And I'm really excited to join in on that celebration too down in Boulder. She's another person I love dearly and just do not get to see enough of. I need to try harder. But along the lines of trying harder, I've at least been getting some things done today. Like.. laundry! A month overdue... I actually ran out of underwear (hard to do with the amount I have. I'm an underwear shopping addict) But yay for now having clean clothes, and a washer and dryer where I can do it all in the comfort of my house without paying the water bill. w00t.
28th-Jul-2006 08:50 pm - Trying to chill on so many levels
It's been a little while~ but hooray for having internet at my new apartment. I think the timing is really good. I can get a little more out. The last few days have been insane. I felt emotional, which made me cry, which then made me feel sick, which all together made me feel even worse. To have so much hit at once was just crippling, emotionally, and I hope to not go through it again any time soon. I still have this big dark cloud around me, but at least I don't feel like there are bolts of lightning coming out of it and hitting me anymore.

Biggest part of this round of extreme upset-ness was Bud. Talking with Chris the other day I realized how much I had cared about Bud, and how hard I had worked to hold that back for so many reasons. It was harsh. The harsher part was that I called Bud the next day and actually got a hold of him, then pretty much got the cold shoulder. Ouch. Shocked me to have to deal with that just after all the crying I had done the night before over him (amongst other things). It is now hard to be alone; I feel almost like a zombie who could cry at any moment. Maybe a vacation would be nice. I dunno. I feel like in general I just don't know what to do. I'm so used to actively fixing my problems, that when I run into something like this where I really just have to wait it out... well it makes things more upsetting and harder to deal with.
19th-Jul-2006 01:10 pm - Ode to my period starting soon
I'm starting to feel like I don't know what to do with myself next. I'm in the midst of a pretty big transition, on several levels, and now I just don't know what to do. I suppose it's easiest to say "Oh just step back from everything and figure it all out before jumping in" right? And I suppose that makes sense. But I can't step away from getting used to a new living situation, or the idea that I need a different (full time) job badly, or that I'm in class again and this really is the last time.
I think it may work on the level that I need to sit back and possibly think about myself, as a single person. I thought these last few months I was doing ok at that, but my mind has been running a mile a minute recently. Part of it may be my period starting in the next three days, but really I do think it's something I need to look at.

The Self Analysis of a Psychology GraduateCollapse )
17th-Jul-2006 12:10 pm - Moving
wah wah!!!
We started moving this weekend! And all I can say right now is that I am REALLY sore. Saturday night we went and hung out there after we had gotten our keys, empty aparment and all. And when we woke up on the floor sunday morning, we started moving stuff. With all the help my apartment got to be very empty very fast, and it made me wish I had been more thorougly packed. I did not expect it to go so quick. But thank you Chris, Ryan, and Emily, for helping me get most my stuff out of here. And especially for helping me move my couch. OMG. That is the biggest, heaviest, son of a bitch couch that ever lived. And moving it up 6 flights (3 floors) of stairs in a narrow closed off stairwell was crazy. Took all four of us, and we have now decided that couch is never leaving the apartment unless it goes off the balcony.

Last night Em and I relaxed and unpacked just a bit, and also ran to Wal Mart late night to find shower curtains and get tacos. Hooray. Did I mention that we have central air in our apartment, and its glorious? Waking up to the nice cool air this morning was awesome. Today is gonna be one more day of crazyness, although maybe slower paced. I have to leave for class soon, and then I'm gonna spend some time here with my kitties, packing up the random left-over shit that's strewn everywhere. We plan to run a few small errands today between unpacking and unloading boxes, and also to hit up the pool later this evening. And tonight.. the kitties move in. Mostly cuz I miss them and feel bad about leaving them at my deserted apartment alone so long. Yaaaay~ I can already tell that living there is going to be great. By the way, Gregg, if you read this, I may be able to use your help later this afternoon to move my TV stand and TV.... I shall call you after class. :)
13th-Jul-2006 10:33 pm - T-shirt I saw today
"I Found Jesus - He was behind the couch the whole time!" *insert picture of iconic Jesus popping up from behind a couch*

Hell yes.

UPDATE: On a whole new random note, I feel like the last few days I've been quietly searching for attention. Reason? Low self esteem, feeling not good enough I suppose. Feeling a bit fat. Yes, I know I'm not, but that doesn't stop someone from feeling one way or another. So for anyone I've annoyed in my search for attention, my apologies. I guess I just want to feel good enough, like people actively want me around. All of a sudden I miss Bud a little... strange how despite 'being over' someone, they still pop into your mind once in a while. Several times over the last two weeks even. It's so hard to get rid of the memory of someone who you cared about. I suppose that's why I was still hurting this year over what happened last spring.

I miss feeling like someone loved me. Loves me. Someone I can love. I ache for that right now.
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